how the system works

did lifehouse think when they named their song blind, did coldplay think when they called it yellow, did we think when we called it the day i'm right

for every action, there's an equal an opposite reaction, for every tale, there's a head, for every dream, someone else has a nightmare

can we blame the tv for our social ills, can we blame the gullible girl who emoed at 12.30 AM at a secluded lake even more ulu then permas and got raped, can we blame the sun for the neglect of the moon.

we write stories in life.

chapter

after chapter

like a book. a dictionary more precisely. where definitively, there can only be 26 chapters to it. it starts with the A and ends with the Z

you flip through it blindly, going through the endless words that make up this dictionary. the jargon confuses, their insignificance to you makes you worry.

Do you tell yourself to consume these words? What are the chances of you ever needing words like serendipity or moira.

assuming you do, you play the mental game, the torture, the abuse.

you push it through treating each alphabet as a learning oppurtunity.

The A, the B the C, like a child taking his first foray into life, you discover His faults, you appreciate them, you dicover Her beauty, you're overwhelmed.

you persevere through difficult times. the D, the F and the G. they give you a hard time, and you hit rock bottom, halfway to giving up, looking at what's further ahead.

Then the great 'I', emerges. you're blinded by self dignity. I want to understand. I want to be proud. I want to stand next to you. you say the I do's, you say the I am's. You say the I will's.

then you move along. J comes the jokes, and K comes Ko, and L comes Lame. You've hit the high. just like Ko and his Lame Jokes. you realise your Journey. you Know you've found it. You know she's the one you Love

Then you past the halfway mark, M, and the only thing that matters to you is finishing it. you can't turn it around, you've past the point of no return. there's no turning M upside down.

you're happy. all you've got to do now is keep the consistency. keeps things happy. it goes smooth, reminding yourself that you embarked on it in the first place, you stuck your foot into it, you're comitted to your cause.

and then.

comes the end. you find no more inspiration. you think that all is lost. you feel neglected by your own choices. You feel the demons outnumbering you. you think that it would have been better, better if you didn't write those first few chapters in your life.

you're confident you've reached the end of the journey. you see the way out. you jump for it in a split second. you're determined to end it, determined to run out the wide door. you breeze past the words, overlooking the details. you smell it approaching, you tell yourself "finally, an end to this journey, my way out of this. after all, who would ever agree to me reading an entire dictionary". The dictionary warns you to tread with caution, give it more time, don't just skim through.

You finally flip to the first page of the next chapter, expecting to find the back cover of the dictionary.

You're shocked. you see the R, written in bold. you see the word RABBIT, gleaming at you, helplessly. You turn back a page. you can't believe your eyes. all this while, you thought you were going to end it. you thought that it was over. and you realise.

all you did in the previous chapter of your life, was Quit.

there are times we all see it like a book. we tend to take the shortest chapters in life and think of it as the end. and you know very well, those last few chapters, X Y Z, are the shortest in life, but fail to look at it this way. Q, is short too. you think its over, but the dictionary goes on even further.

We have hit this Q before. all of us. last year, this year, Now.

The dictionary can teach us words, expand our potential, make us proud of what we know.

But lets not forget its main purpose.

The purpose of the dictionary.

To Teach Us The Meaning Of Life.

for the record, i am feeling what you think i'm feeling, albeit i'm not sitting by a lake. that's for sure.